


please just stay with me

by JuniperGrace



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: A little bit of angst, Campaign 1 (Critical Role), Campaign 2 (Critical Role), F/F, c2e125 spoilers, i think kima and allura should be allowed to retire and be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-17 22:21:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29479131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JuniperGrace/pseuds/JuniperGrace
Summary: *** Spoilers for c2e125 ***The world is, once again, on the brink of ending – or so it seems. And of course, no apocalyptic even would be complete without calling upon the aid of Lady Allura Vysoren. This time, however, Allura thinks her part might be better played from behind the curtain. For her sake and for her wife's.
Relationships: Kima/Allura Vysoren
Comments: 7
Kudos: 67





	please just stay with me

Days off are few and far between for the pair of them. It’s mostly her own fault, Allura knows that. Sitting on two councils and being a prominent arcane user on top of the handful of allies she’s collected over the years tends to lend to a full schedule. Kima’s always asking her to slow down, especially as she’s grown older, and she knows she should. Allura tries to delegate, truly she does. Unused to idleness, however, slowing down is proving to be rather difficult. Her constantly growing list of things that require her attention doesn’t make it easier either. Kima’s not much better – she isn’t adventuring anymore and doesn’t go off to the ends of the earth every couple months anymore, but she’s found a purpose training new guard recruits within the city and seems to find ways to get herself into more than enough trouble in town without going off to fistfight a beholder. 

Their life isn’t terribly exciting anymore – not compared to what it used to be – but they’re happy and they’re safe. They’re together. After everything they’ve been through, Allura thinks she’s happy to just be together.

Sunshine streams through a crack in the heavy curtains that hang over the grand window and she can hear the city coming to life outside. She’s meant to be sleeping still – having promised Kima they could take the day off – but being so used to rising with the sun, Allura is content to simply lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling and trying not to think about work. Kima’s arm is draped haphazardly across her waist and the halfling is snoring softly. Allura considers waking her, but her wife can be such a grump if she’s woken so suddenly… So Allura decides to let her rest, moving carefully to sit up so she can read until Kima wakes. 

Before she can make it more than two pages into the book she’s been trying to read for the past three years it seems, she feels the telltale crackle of energy between her ears – Sending. Yussa’s voice follows shortly after which surprises Allura more than she might like to admit. She wasn’t expecting to hear from him so soon, they speak only once or twice every few years or so, after all. She replies concisely, voice soft as she begins to slide out of bed to make her way to the wardrobe. Kima stirs as she walks away, groggily demanding she come back to bed. 

“The Mighty Nein are on their way,” she says, hurriedly changing. Ribbons and hairbrushes and all sorts of fabrics flurry about her – she’s dressed before her wife can fully rub the sleep from her eyes. 

Kima’s frowning, “The ones who jumped into an unknown magical portal and call you at all hours of the night?  _ They’re _ coming? Allie, it’s our day-” 

Allura crosses back to the bed, pressing a gentle kiss to Kima’s lips, “I know, darling. Yussa messaged, though and things sound dire – If they didn’t, I would have told him to send them another time…”

Groaning, Kima drags herself from the bed, “Right. So how long do we have until-” 

Not long at all, apparently, as Allura feels the shifting of energies which can only mean that The Mighty Nein have arrived. Both of them grieve the loss of their day and Allura softly promises to make it up to her wife before amplifying her voice to let their guests know she’ll be down shortly and tells them to make themselves comfortable. Her brow furrows as she focuses for a moment, setting the kitchen to work preparing a tray of teas to meet her for when she begins to descend the stairs. Magic certainly has its uses. Before she leaves, she kneels down before her wife, brushing untamed hair out of the way so she can kiss her. She feels bad for interrupting their day off, she truly does. “You don’t have to go with me to speak with them if you don’t want to,” she says softly. “I know you were looking forward to-” 

“I know. But I want to put faces to names. And maybe give them a piece of my mind… Go on, I’ll come down once I’m dressed. Don’t want another group of adventuring chucklefucks to steal your nice rug.” 

“It can’t fly anymore, so hopefully we don’t have to worry about it…” 

At that, Kima laughs, tugging herself out of Allura’s arms and disappears into the washroom. Standing, Allura smooths her hands down her simple dress and makes her way down to greet the new arrivals. A platter rattles not too far ahead of her and she can hear the group chatting quietly. She wonders what they could possibly have gotten themselves into since she saw them last…

* * *

When Kima does join her downstairs, the young adventurers seem beyond taken. It doesn’t escape Allura that Kima is studying each and every one of them and has settled herself very deliberately almost in front of her. Even if Allura isn’t worried about these particular guests, she knows Kima will watch them like a hawk until she comes to her own conclusions. Old habits die hard, after all. 

“So,” Allura finally says, taking her seat, “to what do we owe the pleasure?” 

Hearing the Nein describe their predicament, Allura feels much as she did when Vox Machina told her of the return of Thordak – her stomach drops and the room around her seems to spin. She regains her composure much sooner this time, however, perhaps because this Lucien isn’t someone directly from her past. Still, it’s concerning to say the least.

It should shock her more – not much can surprise her these days, though, she’s seen far too much. Realizing they’re being scried on is unsettling, but not surprising given what the Nein have told her thus far. A few of them apologize – words Allura waves off. It doesn’t worry her, not too much. If this Lucien is scrying because he’s interesting in the party, he won’t continue to be a problem once they leave. If he continues to pry, however, she has ways of protecting her home. She wasn’t planning on setting up an anti-magic zone around them, but if they’re going to continue discussing this, it might be for the best… Just for now.

She prides herself on being rather collected – considerably skilled at keeping her wits about her. What worries her, however, is when Kima disappears and returns again in her platinum armor, sword hefted over her shoulder- still gleaming and well-kept (and impossibly sharp) despite the disuse these past few years. Allura Vysoren is not someone most would consider a selfish woman. Her whole life it seems she’s made choices for the betterment of the whole and for people other than herself. But she sees the way Kima’s eyes burn as they speak with The Mighty Nein and she can’t fight off the feeling that if Kima follows them to Eiselcross that she won’t come back. Especially not when she almost lost her for good the last time Kima –  _ Kima _ is still plenty strong. Halflings tend to outlive humans– logically speaking– Kima will likely live another hundred or so years. Arguably, she still has years of fighting left within her. 

Meanwhile Allura… Allura hasn’t slowed, not in the ways some people might think for a human woman well into her sixties. Magic helps with that, she’s sure, but she can feel it in her bones when she pulls herself out of bed some mornings – the way her body creaks or how she aches if she manages to twist exactly the wrong way.... Her own days on the battlefields have long since passed.

Kima wants to go with them – it’s clear in her eyes as she looks at Allura expectantly, “Do you think-” 

“No.” The word comes out harsher than she intends and she pauses, taking a breath, “I’m not losing you again.” 

They speak for a moment more before they excuse themselves, leaving The Mighty Nein waiting in the sitting room, whispering to each other as they make their way back up the stairs. Kima’s humming with an unmistakable energy and the second the door to the room they both step into clicks shut, the halfling spins on her heel and jerks her thumb over her shoulder, “They’re going to get themselves killed, Allie-”  “It’s a dangerous situation, I won’t deny it, Kima. But they’ve survived this far and I think they have it in them to make it through this...”

Only half-listening, Kima continues, “So you’re just going to let them walk headfirst into something – you don’t want to know more? You don’t want to help?” 

“I never said-” 

“We’ve seen so much, they need our help!” 

“Yes, Kima. They need our  _ help _ . And we’re going to help them. But I cannot follow them into Eiselcross – not to fight someone who can negate magic and not to a place that makes teleportation so difficult. I intend to help in every way that I can and I can help best by gathering more information and contacting our allies…”

“But we –” 

“Kima, I cannot lose you – not now. Not after everything, I –” They stand, staring at each other, stunned into silence. Allura swallows hard, taking a moment to gather her wits about her again before she continues. “After everything we’ve been through, Kima, do we not deserve to do our part behind the scenes? Have we not earned the chance to stay home, together –”

Her knees protest as she finds herself kneeling before her wife for the second time today and her hands come to rest at her wife’s waist as she stares into eyes that have grown from their usual warmth into a burning fire. The metal of Kima’s armor is cold to the touch, smooth. It brings back memories she’d much rather leave to the past. She hates how broken her voice sounds as she says Kima’s name. Allura Vysoren is not a selfish woman, but in this moment, she thinks she can allow herself to be. She isn’t above begging, not now, not when Kima going means she won’t be able to follow (or at least, it would almost certainly kill her if she tried). “Please, my love, just stay with me.” 

It isn’t fair of her to ask, she knows it as soon as the words leave her lips, but she also knows she can’t bear to lose her. Not when they’ve come so close so many times before. “If things escalate and we cannot avoid getting directly involved, then of course we will. But I think they’re capable – and we’ve seen others like them achieve just as impossible things…” 

Kima’s quiet for a time, considering her words, chewing her lower lip as she thinks. Having said her piece, Allura knows to give Kima the time to put her argument together and stands, beginning to move about the room and gather different things she believes the Nein will need for their climactic battle with this  _ nonagon _ . 

She pulls a well-worn leather bag from a shelf and then produces two arcane field generators and sets them gently within the sack. Caleb had asked, she recalls, for amber – Cadeuces also (very casually) mentioned needing residuum. She has some of both and she includes them in the satchel along with a healthy handful of gold and a wide array of spell components. Finally, she comes to stop before her staff, considering it before taking it in hand. Arcane energy surges as she takes it, sending a familiar shock of warmth up her arm. 

Seeing Allura reach for her staff pulls Kima from her thoughts, “Are you giving them–” 

“It might help them… It certainly served me well, didn’t it?”

“Yeah, but – it’s your  _ staff _ , Allie. You worked so hard to get it and – you sure you trust them with that? You might not get it back…” 

“‘I’m sure. It should see some use, I think… more than what I’ve been using it for these days at any rate. I’d hate to see it gather dust… Not when it might truly help them.”

Kima nods and falls silent again, watching her wife flit about the room for anything else she can find that might help. A few moments pass, before she says, “I’ll stay.” Golden hair whips around as Allura turns to face her. Kima holds up a finger and continues, “If we hear from them in any way that they’re in over they’re heads, I’m going after them, but for now I’ll stay. I’ll go with you to talk to people – I’ll do what I can by your side…” 

Allura simply nods, her voice barely more than a whisper, “Thank you.”

* * *

Before The Mighty Nein take their leave, they also acquire Allura’s tuning fork to the Astral Sea, a spell scroll for  _ Intellect Fortress _ , and Kima’s Holy Avenger. Both of them make it quite clear that a few of these items are on loan – namely, Allura’s staff, the tuning fork, and the sword. Kima makes a big show of letting Yasha know that if the sword isn’t returned because they all get themselves killed, she’ll find them and kill them. A statement that makes Allura chuckle – having heard it a number of times herself in regards to coming home safely. 

Caduceus offers his staff in exchange for Allura’s – which she almost accepts until Jester warns that his is home to a great many beetles. Kima is given the choice between two of Yasha’s swords – The Skingorger or The Magician’s Judge. Neither seem like a weapon Allura particularly wishes to have in her tower, but she tries not to argue too much seeing as Kima’s given away one of her most favored weapons. 

And then in a flash, they’re gone. Sure enough, any and all chalk marks on the ground are consumed by the spell, leaving the stone just as it was before, and Kima and Allura are left looking at the spot where The Mighty Nein disappeared in deafening silence, the air around them still crackling with the residual energy of Caleb’s teleportation spell. Eventually, Allura clicks her fingers together and sends the tray of teas and snacks back to the kitchen – the sitting room furniture tidying itself while Kima considers the weight of the unfamiliar sword in her hands.

“Did the blue one-”

“Jester?”

“Jester. Did Jester mention… Artagan?” 

“She did.”

“He’s that-” 

“From the Faeywild, yes. A headache for another day, I think…” 

“Right. I guess I should spend some time with this… Magician’s Judge… Think I’ve got to attune to it?” 

“It would make sense if you did. It is a magical weapon, after all.” The name is imposing as it is, but the sword’s history is not lost on Allura. “I’m sure you’ll want to go practice?” 

“Wouldn’t be good to end up having to swing it around without knowing how it’s weighted and everything.” 

“Of course.” Allura pauses, “I suppose we have our work cut out for us, don’t we? I should probably get started with writing some letters if we’re to follow through on making contact. And I should probably make a trip to the library… There’s much to learn about if we’re going to help… And Kima?”

The halfling pauses, one foot already out the door, “Yeah?”

“Thank you, love. For agreeing to stay.” 

Kima gives her a small smile, but nods, and turns to go. The door closes gently behind her and then Allura is left alone in her tower. They’ll have to speak later – Allura doesn’t want this to stretch into a kind of chasm that once stretched between them, not when they worked so hard to repair that distance – but they both need time. All plans for a day off forgotten now, Allura ascends the stairs once more to start on her own work. 

Kima’s already sleeping soundly by the time Allura makes her way to their room – The Magician’s Judge taking The Holy Avenger’s spot against the wall in case of trouble.

* * *

She isn’t sure what wakes her, but the sheets beside her are cold to the touch when Allura turns over – her wife missing from their bed. Silver moonlight creeps through a crack in the curtains, revealing no halfling woman anywhere in the room. Brow furrowing, Allura stretches and pulls herself from the warmth of the blankets to find her wife and bring her back to bed. 

Going floor by floor, room by room, takes some time, but Allura eventually finds Kima sitting alone at the kitchen table. The room is lit only by a small fire in the fireplace, a chill sneaking in despite the flames. Kima stares absently into a still-steaming mug of what smells like chamomile tea. The first indication that something isn’t right – Kima often rather stubbornly isists that she hates tea. Allura is silent as she crosses to the table, settling herself into the chair opposite Kima as quietly as she can, not wanting to disturb her. She’s quiet for a few moments more before finally reaching out to cover one of Kima’s hands with her own, breaking the silence carefully. 

“Kima?” 

“Allie.” Her name is a whisper across Kima’s lips as the halfling’s eyes seem to focus, mind coming to in the dimly lit room. “Sorry, did I wake you? I tried not to, I just – woke up. Couldn’t get back to sleep and I didn’t want to just lie there, so I-” 

“It’s alright, my love. I was just worried…” 

“Thought I’d run out on you?” Kima’s joking – the telltale lightness to her tone only makes Allura feel worse for even considering it. “Packed up in the middle of the night and gone off to face nonagons and Tomb Takers all on my own?” 

“It crossed my mind,” Allura admits, causing Kima to raise an eyebrow. “But you said you would stay – you don’t go back on your word often.” 

“Yeah, I’m a halfling of my word,” she agrees with a grin. The smile slips from the corner of her lips as she falls silent again, however, and she stares into her cup. “I did consider it… For a second. That big guy – Fjord, I think – made it sound so enticing… joining in the fray… glory and all that… Sometimes I miss it.” 

Kima pauses, looking up to meet Allura’s gaze. When Allura doesn’t say anything, she continues, “But you’re right, aren’t you? You always are – it’s infuriating sometimes, you know. But we’ve fought so hard for so long to be able to have this –” she gestures to the room around them, “and even if it’s not as exciting as it was twenty years ago, I’d be an idiot to just jump into a battle I wasn’t ready for – it’s been so long since I went running into a fight. Sure, I keep myself busy, but nowhere near the level of what they’d need of me.” 

“It was selfish of me to ask you to stay like that in front of them, though – I shouldn’t have –” 

“No. You were right. And if I went, you’d be dumb enough to follow me.” 

“I would not –”    
  
“Yes you would, don’t even try to tell me you wouldn’t, Allie.” Allura can’t continue to argue – she  _ would _ go after Kima… And Kima nods, “It doesn’t really make it easier – I’m still kinda itching to do  _ something _ , but I’ll be more useful staying here. With you. I can go with you if you have to go meet anyone and someone’s gotta make sure you don’t work yourself into the grave…”

Allura tries not to pout at Kima’s last point, but she knows her wife is right. “They’re going to be fine – they remind me a bit of Vox Machina in a sense. Earlier on, more like when I first met them… And also like us when we were younger…. They’re determined and chaotic, but I think they’re going to be able to come out of this alive.”

“Yeah?”

Allura hums, running her thumb over the top of Kima’s hand in lieu of an actual answer. Comfortable silence grows between them, the fire crackling softly in the background until Kima stifles a yawn and Allura chuckles, “Can I take you back to bed?”

“Lead the way, m’lady.” 

The fire puts itself out as they both stand, Allura offering her hand to Kima who takes it eagerly as they make their way back to bed. Sconces light themselves as they ascend the windowless staircase, each woman taking care not to stumble on the steps. Their room is still mostly dark, lit only by the sliver of moonlight through the heavy curtains. As they settle back into bed, Allura gathers Kima in her arms, pulling her close, whispering wishes for sweet dreams into her love’s ear. 

Sleep begins to wash over her, body growing heavier as it does, when Kima groans. 

“I gave them my sword.” 

Half asleep, Allura chuckles and tugs her wife closer. 

They’re going to be just fine. 

**Author's Note:**

> anyone else like me and sob their way through that hour long moment in the episode where they were in allura's tower? when i say i was giddy but i was also crying - i wish i was kidding. anyways, i hope you enjoyed this tender angst. happy (belated) valentines day <3 
> 
> as always, you're welcome to check out my [tumblr](http://finelyfrenzied.tumblr.com) if you want to chat or have a fic prompt! thank you so much for reading; i hope you enjoyed it as much as i enjoyed writing it! 
> 
> and... is it thursday yet?


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